I came round from the anaesthetic feeling very odd. My brain was not attached to my body, and I got the giggles. But then I moved, and the room started to spin, and the nausea hit me. I tried to focus on a face that swum in front of my eyes, and as I succeeded, the pain began to creep up on me from my groin.

"Fuck. Ooh, that hurts," I remembered to speak.

"Sandi, can you hear me?" this voice kept saying.

"Yes, but that fucking hurts," I said, with some feeling.

"Sandi, look at me," the voice said.

I looked at the face, and Dr Boyle swam into focus.

"It hurts, doctor," I whimpered.

"It is going to, we will get some painkillers going, but you have had major surgery."

I looked down, and I saw I was covered up. "Did it work?" I asked.

He laughed.

"Yes, it went very well. And when you are a little better, I will come and tell you what else I found."

"Else?" I asked, confused.

"Shh. Rest now, and I will see you tomorrow. The anaesthetic will make you a little drowsy and nauseous, so try no keep resting today. But you have a lot of work to do over the next week or so."

"Oh, the dilators," I said.

He smiled, "That's right, but they will take you back to your room, and you can sleep for a bit."

I remembered watching the light fittings flick past as I was wheeled back to my room, but I went to sleep before I got there.

I woke up in bed, and Jenny was sitting by the bed.

"Hi Jen," I croaked.

"How are you girl?"

I smiled.

"A girl."

"You okay?" she asked.

"Hurts like fuck, but it means it worked," I said. I looked round the room, there were flowers everywhere.

"The flowers?" I said.

She went round reading from all the cards. Everyone I knew had sent some, and I cried, and passed out again.

She was still there when I came round again an hour later.

"Sorry Jenny, it is the anaesthetic."

"It's okay. Still sore?"

I nodded. A nurse came in.

"Hi Sandi, I'm Maureen, how are you feeling?"

"Sore and sick," I said.

She looked at one of the two IV drips going into my arm.

"This one is pain relief, this tap here turns it up or down. You can do that yourself. If the pain gets too much, then turn it like this, and the other way if you start floating."

"Floating?"

"It is morphine based, and you do not want too much."

"Oh. Leave it where it is for the moment then," I said.

There was another tube coming from my groin, which was heavily bandaged. I assumed it was a urinary catheter.

"How long do I stay plumbed in?" I asked.

"We will take the dressings off tomorrow, and see how you are doing."

I felt pretty grotty, and Jenny gave me a hug and left me alone. I dozed off.

My dreams were amazing.

The next morning the pain was still there, but the nausea was gone. I kept the pain control quite low, while I was awake it was fine, as long as I could concentrate on something.The doctor came in and spent time taking the dressing off, and examining the area. I was allowed to see and it looked like a war wound. Very swollen and sutures everywhere. They had shaved me, but it looked brilliant, I was a girl.

"Right, Sandi. You are a complicated girl, aren't you?"

"Why?"

"Well, you had a surprise for me. It is no wonder you had some gender confusion. You had some female reproductive organs already inside you, but not completely developed. I have not been able to conduct tests yet, but I think you are either the product of two fertilised eggs coming together as one foetus. Or, whilst developing, you never lost those female vestiges that all foetuses have at some point. You were not a true hermaphrodite, as you never had a full set of organs from each gender. However, I can tell you that your pelvis is female, and your chromosomes are XX. So legally, physically and in every other way, you are now wholly female."

I stared at him.

"But I had normal male stuff."

"Yes, but I suspect that you were sterile as a male. And, as you have a very nice set of ovaries, fallopian tubes, a womb and a cervix, I see no reason why you shouldn't live a perfectly normal life as a woman. Particularly as I have constructed everything else you will need."

"Did you use the extra skin from my penis and scrotum?"

"You didn't have very much. I used what I could, and you have a clitoris, and labia. Your vagina is partly the outer skin from your penis, and partly tissue from your colon. There is a slight risk of scar tissue forming at the join, so it is important that you persist with the dilation programme we discussed."

"What happens if scar tissue does form?"

"If you have difficulty with the larger dilators, then I may have to go in again to just make things a little neater. Otherwise you won't be able to have sex properly."

"You said that I had ovaries, are they working?"

"They are not fully developed or functioning yet. The hormone implant has had an effect, and they are at a stage of a prepubescent girl, of say eleven or so. But they are on the way, and are beginning to produce hormones of their own. I had to take the implant out, as your level of oestrogen was way too high to be healthy. I should say that you should experience menstruation in five or six weeks."

"You mean I will bleed?"

"Yes."

"But that means that I am.."

"It means that you are not a transsexual, you are a young woman, physiologically, psychologically, emotionally and legally. It doesn't often happen, and you are my first."

"Shit!" I said, and he laughed.

"So, lets have the packing out in a day or so, and then you can start with the dreaded dilators. If I say so myself, I don't even think your gynaecologist will be able to tell you haven't been a girl all your life."

"What would I need one of them for?"

"Well, I see no reason why you shouldn't eventually conceive and bear a child, or several, if that is your wish."

There was a rushing in my ears, and I was afraid I had misheard him.

"What?"

He smiled and sat on the edge of my bed. He took my right hand, as my left had tubes in it.

"Sandi, you are a perfectly normal girl now. You had a gender disorder, but I have removed the problem, and corrected any deficiencies. I believe that you will be fertile, and therefore, I see no reason why you shouldn't have children."

The rushing got worse, and I felt light headed. I was glad that I was in bed. Tears sprang to my eyes, and laughter welled up in my chest. Both broke out together, and he smiled at me.

Never in my wildest dreams had I even considered the remotest possibility that I would ever be a mother. It was almost too much, and I wept and laughed at the same time.

Maureen came in and she and the doctor replaced my dressings, and he left me still giggling.

"So, it seems you are as surprised as the rest of us?" Maureen said.

"Just a bit," I said.

"Did you have any idea?"

"I just knew I should have been a girl. I felt right as a girl, and wrong as a boy, it is as simple as that."

"Well, I do like to see a happy ending," she said.

"This is just the beginning," I said, and she laughed.

The door opened and a bunch of flowers walked in. Dave's head peered round the side of them.

"Hi gorgeous, how are you?" he said, and I burst into tears, and Maureen left us, chuckling to herself.

Dave looked worried, as I don't think he expected that reaction.

"I'm a girl, Dave."

"I know that. I've always known that."

"No Dave, you don't understand. I am a real girl. The doctor found that I had ovaries and a womb and everything. Even my pelvis and chromosomes are female. The male bits were useless, I have always had girl bits, and now they are beginning to work."

He stared at me, his mouth open.

"Dave?"

"Fuck me!" he said.

"Yes. I probably will," I said, simply.

"Bloody hell, Sandi, are you sure?"

I nodded.

He took my hand.

"Look, just know that it makes no difference to me. I love you for who you are, and that is all there is to it. But I am pleased, more for you as I know it means so much to you."

I started to cry again, he was just too nice to me.

He stayed for hours, and even sat next to me on my bed. Although the pain, or dull ache was quite bad, I kept the pain relief to a minimum as I wanted to keep morphine out of my system as much as possible.

Dave distracted me, and we watched TV and played cards together. He was so tender and loving, I kept crying and laughing. He must have thought I was really dippy.

Jenny, Mike, Caroline and Rachel arrived, and a party atmosphere blossomed. Jenny had told them that I had 'a problem down below' and I decided it was truth time. My news didn't really surprise anyone, particularly as they all thought I was a girl anyway. In fact they were more surprised that I had been a boy in the first place. A wave of euphoria hit me, and I didn't need morphine, I was on a high. But I was tired, and Maureen shooed them away so I could have a sleep. Dave promised to come back every day, and he kissed me. I ached for him again, and smiled, now I was almost ready for him.

I slept most of the afternoon, and at about four o'clock a nurse came and checked my dressings.

"That looks very clean, I think we will let you have a bit of air now. I'll take out the catheter, so you can go to the loo."

It was better without the tight bandages on, and I was allowed to walk about a bit. But I felt rather wobbly, and was not awfully adventurous. I was given a light tea, and managed to eat everything. I had a little sleep after tea, and woke up when I felt a draught.

My Dad stood there. "Hi, little love," he said.

"Dad."

He smiled.

"I can't stay long. I see you have coppers watching you."

"You saw them?"

"Yeah, it's easy when you know."

"Jim Randall arranged it."

"I was hoping he would. How are you?"

"Great. I was a girl after all."

He frowned, and I had to explain it to him.

"Are you pleased?" he asked.

I simply smiled and nodded.

"Good, then I'm pleased for you. You looked great in the fashion show."

"I looked for you, but you buggered off'" I said.

"Yeah, things are tricky. Frankie wants my balls."

"He can have mine, I don't have them any more'" I said, and he smiled. He looked drawn and tired.

"I'm off to the States tomorrow. I don't know if I will be back for a while.

Did you clear out the safe in my room?"

I told him everything that I had done, and he nodded.

"Good girl. Frankie wants £8,000,000, or I am dead."

"I thought the deal was for £5,000,000?"

"Interest, he says, I have until the end of July."

"Can you raise it?"

"Maybe, but it will be tight, and even then I reckon he wants me dead, so I am looking at alternatives."

"Like what?"

"Frankie is into a deal in New York. Drugs, so maybe I can help the FBI and get into a witness protection programme."

"Don't we do that over here?"

"I'm too well known. Besides, I'm wanted for murder now."

I was silent, as I had forgotten that.

"Look Sandi, I am so fucking sorry. I never meant for you to get dragged into this. When I saw those bastards with you, I just decided to do the only thing I could."

"You didn't have to, I was fooling them. They thought I was just the bloody maid."

"They wouldn't have stayed fooled for long."

"Why don't you sell all the properties abroad?"

"What for, I'd still need a good five million on top. No, Frankie wants me dead, but he is hoping to have the cash as well."

I looked pained.

"Are you okay love?"

"No, I'm fucking not. I'm in pain, I feel like shit, my world has been turned upside down, and my Dad is a bloody crook, and I am going to lose him, and I have only just got to know him!" I said, and the tears started again. He came and sat down on the bed next to me.

"I'm so sorry."

"Sorry doesn't make it better," I said, and he looked miserable.

"Look Dad, Mum had a go at you, and you didn't bloody listen, and you lost her. But I lost her too, and that bloody hurts. Now you say you are sorry, well so what. Unless you change, you will lose me too."

"I will, as soon as I square off Frankie."

"Dad, there will always be a Frankie. Who are you trying to kid?"

"Honest, this is the last one."

"How often did you say that to Mum?"

He went quiet and looked down.

"Too bloody often!"

I stared at him.

He smiled.

"You are so like your Mum, it hurts me to look at you."

"I don't want you to die, Dad, you are all I have left."

Tears came to his eyes.

"I love you so much," he said.

"Yeah," I said, the sarcasm creeping into my voice.

"Sandi, I do. Really!"

"I love you too Dad, but you have to stop."

"I will, I promise."

"Now Dad."

"I can't. I have to sort things out."

Tears fell from my eyes, and he reached out and stroked my cheeks.

"Hey. I'll call you on your mobile. You still have it don't you?"

I nodded.

"I had better go. I'm glad you are on the mend, and I hope this blows over. I want to see you grow up."

"Duh. Dad, I am grown up."

"Then I'd like to see my grandchildren."

I cried some more.

He kissed me and left as silently as he had come. I turned my face to the pillow and wept.

I was determined to get out as soon as possible, and on the 20th July, after five days I was released. I continued my dilation exercises religiously, and after weeks of hard graft, I was delighted when number five (the big one.) slipped up without any pain or blockage.

Dave had gone to the States with Mike for a grand tour, and so Jenny and I were working in the busy hotel, and flirting with any juicy blokes we could find. Mr Boyle had completed a certified note so I was legally female, and therefore entitled to have my birth certificate changed to read female. I made sure everything else was changed as well. I applied for my passport as Alexandra Lake, and was pleased as punch when it arrived.

I went back for a check up on the 1st August, and Mr Boyle declared himself delighted with my progress. I was very happy to hand back the dilators that I had 'borrowed'.

"Have you bled yet?"

I shook my head.

"Any sore tummies?"

I frowned.

"What kind?"

He gently placed his hands on my abdomen, either side of my navel, and slightly above.

"Yeah, a little. A couple of days ago. I thought it was my tummy muscles after playing tennis."

"That, my girl, was you ovulating. Expect a visitor in a little while."

"Oh."

"And, what contraception method are you planning?"

I stared at him and he smiled.

"I thought so. The tests on your ovaries show you are fertile, so unless you are careful, you will be a mummy."

"Oh."

"You are almost completely healed now, but to be safe I would leave it for another month at least. If you see your GP, then it takes a month for the pill to kick in. I have written a letter to her so she knows which one would be best for you."

"Oh," I repeated.

"I met your boyfriend, is he still around?"

"He's in the States."

"Oh," he said, and I laughed.

"How are things between you?"

"I'll have to wait for him to come back."

"How long is he away?"

"Too long, three months."

"Oh, do you miss him?"

"Silly question," I said, and smiled.

"Well, be careful. You are still fragile, and you don't want to rupture anything at this stage."

"I will be. I am not desperate to lose my virginity. It is something that I can lose only once, so I want it to be special and with someone I really love."

"Sensible girl. Well, I am done with you for the time being. If you have any problems down there, then call my secretary. Otherwise, I am sure that Dr Shepherd will be able to cope."

"Thanks so much," I said. He stood up, and I shook his hand. He kissed me on both cheeks. "I am sure I will see you in the papers and on TV soon. Beauty like yours can never be hidden for long."

I blushed, and said goodbye.

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