"Good evening everyone"

"Evening," chorused back from the waiting audience.

"You'll be pleased to know that both Dennis and our coach have now arrived so our excursion programme will be almost unchanged." There was a little cheer as I checked my clipboard. "We have four excursions planned for you, tomorrow we go into Switzerland to see the wonderful Rheinfall at Schaffhausen. On Tuesday we have an excursion to the famous Spa town of Baden Baden with a scenic drive through the, how is it? Oh yes, high Black Forest. Dennis needs a rest so you have a free day on Wednesday, there are local excursions if you like or there are many pleasant fussweg, sorry footpaths in the area." I looked around the room; I seemed to have an attentive audience.

"On Thursday we will go to see the cuckoo clocks at Triberg and also the lake of Titisee. Finally on Friday instead of our usual forest drive, we will go to visit Freiburg, which we missed this morning. In the evening we will be having a barbecue and Heimatsnacht." I concluded

One reason this tour is usually pretty well supported is that all the excursions are included, no extras unless you want to go out on the 'rest day'. It also makes it easier for me and Den, no money to collect, no extra organization at all.

"Breakfast will be from seven thirty and our evening meal will be at six thirty. The hotel have asked me to remind you that they can supply packed lunches so please to not take food from breakfast. Also if you should like a bath, you need to get a plug from reception. If you have any questions, you can find Den and myself downstairs in the Stube after dinner. Thank you for your attention, enjoy your meal. Oh sorry I forgot to say, we leave at nine in the morning"

As if waiting for my signal, the waitresses appeared with the soup course and everyone's attention moved from me to their stomachs.

"How many times will you have to repeat that tonight?" Den asked

"I reckon at least a dozen" I sighed. If they took in even half of what I just told them I'd have done well!

In the couple of hours since Dens arrival we had exchanged the details of our day, Den even managed to catch more sleep than me while they worked on Betsy. He was mildly amused by Freddie's attempts to chat me up, I guess if I'm gonna look like this all summer I'd better start learning how to cope with male attention. In fact it was Den who pointed out that it was a surprise it hadn't already happened.

"So any ideas for Wednesday?" Den enquired, "I think there's a bus we could take down to Sackingen"

"Well" I started, "I've booked us seats on a coach trip"

"Busman's holiday eh? So where're we going?"

"Switzerland"

"What, Basel or something?"

"A bit further than that, Interlaken and the Bernese Oberland" I told him

"Phew, sounds like one of your specials, what is it? Eight o'clock start?"

"Seven"

Den nearly choked on his soup and it was only chicken noodle!

"Seven! You certainly pick 'em girl"

After dinner we made our way down to the in house pub, the 'Jägermeister', down in the basement. It's a cosy little room, used by hotel guests and locals alike. The décor is all dark wood overlain with as you might expect hunting paraphernalia and strangely a host of pictures and posters of music acts of the German rock variety!

We joined the few local patrons and settled down at a corner table, Den on 'Alkoholfrei' and I settled on light beer. The bar tender was actually doing an excellent trade acting as the local pizza chef and he was serving as much coffee as beer!

At some point in the evening most of the coach made at least a brief visit to our little hidey hole and yep, Den and I had to repeat most of my earlier words at least a dozen times! The plug thing raised a few laughs; maybe they've suffered from plug thieves in the past!

"Have you seen Maria yet?" Den asked as we made our way up to our rooms a little before eleven.

"No, when I asked earlier, the girl on reception said she was away for the weekend"

"Probably catch her in the morning then."

Hmmm, I stretched and squirmed laid in my bed but after an initial feeling of euphoria something felt wrong. I sat up with a start and opened my eyes at the same time; there was an unfamiliar weight on my chest! Then it came back to me, my new friends, my hands grabbed my silicon additions and with a sigh I sagged back onto the pillow.

Once more I went over everything that brought me to this point, Austria, the Rhine, the conversation with Bill, Jools reaction. I bet there are people out there who'd kill for this, I'm not one of them, I'm doing it for the money, aren't I? The name change, the passport, this whole thing, it's just a job, but I'm allowed to enjoy my job aren't I?

A pressing desire to empty my bladder finally got me out of bed, as I sat on the pan it hit me that there was a lot more to being Nena than just wearing skirts and dresses. I'm sat here because for now at least, my body looks female, the breast forms and the silicon pussy sure accomplish that. I've always been small waisted and never exactly muscle bound so seeing me now, well I look like the girl I'm supposed to be, but do I want to be? My musing was interrupted by the alarm, I sighed; time to 'become' Nena!

"Nena!" Den beckoned me over, "Nena, this is Maria, she's in charge round here"

Having done this trip before I do of course know Maria as Chris, now I have to get acquainted as me, that is Nena.

"Hello Nena, welcome to my little empire, sorry I missed you yesterday, I had a weekend away"

"Nice to meet you. Somewhere nice?" I asked

"Skiing"

"Skiing?" Den and I both echoed, I mean it's forecast for about thirty degrees today.

"In Austria, you can ski all year on the high glaciers" she explained

I remembered then, they were skiing on the Stubai the other week when we were in Austria.

"So Nena, Den tells me you have joined Global for the season?"

"Yes, I filled in on a couple of trips then they asked me join full time"

"Well you two best get your breakfast, we can talk later, you are going to Rheinfalle today?"

"Just a short trip" Den agreed

"See you later then"

"Bye" I replied with a little finger wave. Finger wave! I'm even picking up some of Julia's mannerisms.

After eating, Den fetched the revitalized Betsy and a couple of minutes late we set off for the day. We dropped down to Bad Sackingen and headed east alongside the Rhein, it always seems a bit strange that the other side of the river is another country, Switzerland. The punters were in fine fettle this morning, rested and looking forward to the day. Carrier bag was dressed identically to yesterday and the bloke from our late couple, late again this morning by the way, had his coat on despite the early heat!

Shortly after Waldshut we left the river and another dozen or so K's we stopped at the Swiss border. Den slipped over to the office to do the paperwork and I sat watching a farmer cutting hay with one of the oldest tractors I've ever seen! It was only about five minutes before Den returned with one of the border guard.

"Passports please", he climbed on board and made his way back up the bus.

I fumbled in my bag for my passport, hmmm, my passport, I opened it up and looked at my picture. Is this really me? Nena Agnetha Ziegler, Agnetha! I shook my head in amusement.

"Fraulein?"

"Oh sorry" I handed my passport over.

He was being pretty thorough, flicking through the little book and checking me against the picture. He gave me an odd look but then closed it and gave it back.

"Okay, have a nice day" he swung off the coach, Den closed the door and we covered the remaining distance to Schaffhausen, Switzerland's biggest town north of the Rhein. First stop today isn't the town though but the falls.

"What time?" I asked Den

"Well, an hour is usually long enough?"

"There's a few seniors on though," I mentioned

"Okay, back on the bus at twenty past twelve" Den agreed as he reversed Betsy into a bay of the already busy coach park. Once we were stopped I took up the microphone.

"We hope you enjoyed the drive, in a moment we will go to look at the Rheinfall. We will depart at twelve twenty for the short drive into Schaffhausen for our lunch stop, please be back promptly. So if you can wait at the front of the bus I will take you to the falls"

I stepped down and the passengers began their exit, the lates were even last off the bus! After ensuring that I had everyone I led the way, the long way, down to the riverside, the roar of the falls finally reaching us as we emerged from the trees. It's a bit strange looking at these falls, it's difficult to get a grip on the scale at first, you know it must be pretty big but well, it doesn't seem so big.

"I'll leave you all here, you can walk up to the top of the falls, there are boats that do a trip up to the falls and there are several cafés. If you can be prompt back to the coach please"

My charges started to dissipate, some along towards the falls and others to the little island that the boats go from. I waited on a bench for Den, who arrived in short order having taken the steep short route down.

"Coffee?"

"Something cold for me" I mentioned

We started walking up the river towards the falls, thankfully there was a bit of shade from the few trees along the bank, the never-ending noise from the falls a constant background. In the sunshine there was a permanent rainbow in front of the falls where you could now get a better idea of scale with the tourist boats bobbing around. Not exactly Niagara but still pretty impressive!

I was feeling more comfortable today.

After a few minutes walk we reached a little path side café, we collared a table and the waitress was soon in charge of our order. "Phew! I didn't think it would be this warm today" I mentioned propping my sunnies on my forehead. "At least you don't have to wear your uniform, I'm fair cooking in this shirt and trousers" Den complained "Finally an advantage to being a girl!" "Hiya Den" a familiar voice called out, "and it's Nena isn't it?" It was George and his sidekick, the lovely Maureen. Oh you remember, they were at Krimml the other week, they work for Wallace Arnold.

"Hi George, Maureen. Didn't see your bus when we pulled in"

"We got here just after you" George told us

"And how's Nena then?" Maureen enquired

I could do without this but it's expected!

"Okay thank you, you will join us?"

"Thanks luv, I could do with a sensible conversation." She mentioned perching her not inconsiderable bum into a chair. The waitress was on the ball and everyone's drinks arrived in short order. George had Den's attention leaving me on my own with Mo.

"I thought you were only filling for young Chris when we saw you in Austria Nena?"

"That time yes but afterwards Global offered me work for the rest of the season, so here I am"

"Well good for you, it's nice to see some fresh young faces on the tours. So you're doing the Black Forest?"

"Black Forest? Oh Schwarzwald, yes we are at Todtmoos?" I laid it on a bit thick

"Frodenstat" she told me, I guess she meant Freudenstadt rather than a Hobbit town.

"A nice town" I commented, "I think we go through later in the week"

"I hope you won't take this the wrong way Nena, but "

"Leave the lass alone Mo. Sorry Nena, I thought you had a look of young Chris about you the other week"

"A look? Oh of course!" I managed a giggle, "he is how do you say Vetter?"

"Related? Den prompted

"Yes related, I remember now, cousin, yes distant cousin. That is how I know Global. I did not think I looked so like him"

"You don't lass" well that's, erm, reassuring! "But you have the same eyes" George finished

You're not kidding we do! Thankfully the conversation moved onto safer topics, our passengers, and our adventure of an outward journey, well basically talking shop.

"What's the time anyone?" Maureen asked

"Oh bugger, it's five to!" George exclaimed

"Looks like we'll be late instead of the passengers" Mo joked, "well nice to see you again Nena, I'm sure we'll see you about"

"Bye Den, Nena" George threw over his shoulder as he moved his companion in the right direction.

"Have a good trip" I called after them

"You too" Maureen replied

"We going for a walk?" Den asked

"I guess so," I agreed

We settled up and walked the short distance to the base of the falls where the noise was pretty incredible. I was glad I'd gone for trainers today when we headed up the steep path past the old watermill to emerge at the top of the falls. The constant noise of falling water was at least muted some up here and we stood watching the turbulent waters for a few minutes before heading back to Betsy.

Not exactly Niagra is it?.

"What's that smell?" Den enquired as we emerged into the bus park. "Hmmm, hotdogs" I drooled "I've not seen a stand," Den mentioned "That's why," I pointed to one of the German coaches, "they're cooking them on the bus" "Don't you get any ideas, I'm not having my bus stinking of hotdogs!" "Spoilsport"

Well our little ruse on timing seemed to work; we actually had everyone on board before we were scheduled to depart! It was only a short drive up into Schaffhausen proper where we parked in what doubles as both coach park and bus station. We gave the passengers directions for the town, they were getting a couple of hours to eat and explore so we had plenty of time.

Den got his screen cleaning kit out and I perched on the step with my book, I've got Bernard Cornwell's Harlequin this week, a good medieval romp! I'd been reading for about ten minutes when I remembered something.

"Den, you got many Swiss Francs?"

"A few, maybe a tenners worth, why?"

"We'll probably need some on Wednesday"

"Good thinking batman"

"I'll change some up when we go into town then"

"Well I'm just about done, I'm only doing the windscreen now"

It was a good ten minutes later that we left Betsy and headed through the underpass to the town.

"There's a few banks just up there," Den pointed to our right.

"Credit Suisse will do, I've used them before"

Talk about a weird bank! Normal banking was on the ground floor but a big sign stating 'Bureau de Change / Wechsel' pointed us up a curious spiral stairway onto an upper level. We joined the short queue for a teller.

"Doesn't look much like a bank does it?" Den observed

"Huh?" I was fumbling in my bag for my traveller's cheques and passport. "Er no I guess not" I agreed having a quick glance up and around the room. In truth it looked more like insurance office, no partitions or security glass, no it was all open plan and quite relaxed. We only waited a couple of minutes before we got a teller.

"Ich möchte gern diese Reisechecks einlösen bitte"

I presented the cheques with my passport and the young woman counted them out.

"Zweihundert Euro?"

"Ja, bitte"

"Schweize Franc?"

"Bitte"

"Der Wechselkurs ist zwei fünfzehn"

"Okay"

She played about on her keyboard for a moment then passed the slips over for signing. Signing! I've only been Nena Ziegler since Friday and my Passport signature is hardly a signature at all, more a written statement of fact! For the second time today I got a funny look as she examined my passport.

"Er moment bitte" she excused herself and taking my passport and the signed cheques headed to her supervisor.

"What's that all about?" Den enquired

"Dunno" we didn't get a chance to think too much about it as the teller and supervisor arrived at the desk.

"Excuse me Fraulein, this is yours?" the supervisor asked in good English

"Yes, is there something wrong?"

"No not really, but I advise you to get your passport corrected, it says you are a man which you are obviously not"

I heard Den chuckling behind me, I decided to play dumb.

"Where?"

"Zis code here" he pointed to a string of numbers across the edge of the page, "this letter here should be F not M"

"Computers" I sighed, "thanks for telling me"

"A pleasure Miss Ziegler, Hilde will get your money" he left with Den trying to suppress his laughter.

The teller, Hilde finished on the keyboard, obviously nothing much gets past her, and there was a minute or so delay before a canister popped out of a recess in the desk. Ah so that's why there's minimal security, there's no cash kept on the floor, cool! She counted out the brightly coloured Swiss notes and dropped the cheques into the canister and sent it off to who knows where.

"Apologies for the delay Fraulein, have a pleasant stay in Switzerland"

"Thanks Hilde, wiedersehn!"

"Wiedersehn"

Well after that I was, I don't know, relieved, annoyed? A bit of both I suppose, relieved that they thought it was an error and annoyed that they didn't doubt that I was a girl. Or is that the other way round? Now I'm confused.

We walked into the main town square and randomly selected a table outside of a bar.

"I don't know how you did it?" Den said poker faced as I pored over the menu.

"What, in the bank?"

"No, well that as well. No how did you manage to pretend to be a bloke for so long?"

I couldn't have been listening properly.

"Pretending to be" then I got it! "Den, just you wait!"

"Seriously Nena, I know and I only see a girl opposite me, what chance has anyone else got, I'll tell you, none"

I was distracted by two of the waiters, I got a bit of their mumbled conversation on the breeze which roughly translated as 'I wouldn't mind a bit of that' 'that lucky old sod with her'. I don't think I'll tell Den! I was brought back to the present by Den's voice.

"What's this Nena?" he pointed to a name

"Gitziprägel?" I wasn't sure, "some sort of fritter I think" I addressed the waiter, I'm sure he winked at me!

"Was ist Gitziprägel bitte?"

"Kaninchen im Schlagteig, eine spezial auf Schweize" he advised

"Battered rabbit" I translated, "some sort of local thing"

"Well you only live once!" Den addressed the waiter, "Eine bitte"

"Gitziprägel, und fur die Fraulein?"

I scanned the menu again.

"Was ist die Tagessuppe bitte?"

"Spargelsuppe"

Hmmm, asparagus!

"Okay, eine Suppe und eine Jura Omelette bitte"

"Trinke?"

"Zwei Glas Cola bitte"

"Eis?"

"Ja danke"

I know he winked this time!

"Eine Gitziprägel, eine Tagessuppe, eine Jura Omelette und zwei Cola" he reprised our order, then headed off to no doubt exchange comments about me with his mates.

It must have shown on my face.

"It goes with the territory you know"

"What does?"

"Getting chatted up"

"He wasn't was he?"

"Women!" Den rolled his eyes

"You're having me on!" I took a playful swipe at him

"Well you looked so serious. So what are you having?"

"Asparagus soup and a fancy cheese omelette"

Our drinks arrived and soon after so did our food. Dens rabbit smelt as good as it looked and the asparagus soup was hmmm, gorgeous! We still had a bit of time after we finished eating so Den came up with the idea of climbing up to the 'castle'. It was a fair ol' climb but eventually we emerged at the top, I was more than happy to collapse onto a bench while Den got us some frozen dairy product, you know, ice cream.

We sat looking down over the river and town below for a few minutes while we ate our ices. The sun beat down incessantly so after a quick stroll around the walls we headed down, back to the here and now of work. We managed to beat any of the passengers back to the bus, Den got the air con going while we waited, it was well over 100 inside Betsy! I watched fascinated as one of the famous Swiss Post buses came in to the little bus station and collected a huge four wheel trailer before collecting a couple of passengers and heading out into the Swiss countryside. Talk about integrated systems!

The passengers started drifting back, Bag Man had acquired a straw hat and the Lates lived up to their reputation, late and him still in his overcoat! There's not much choice of route back to Todtmoos so we retraced our route with only a brief stop at the border point this time. I did a drinks run, much appreciated and the cold drink supply was running low but after the trip down we could do with topping up the coffers!

Den had obviously been studying his Falk because he had us on some narrow lanes through some pleasant little villages, by some of the looks we got, coaches don't usually use this route! We pulled up back at the hotel a bit after five and although it had only been a shortish trip I was knackered! Must be the heat.

"Good day you two?" Maria asked as we joined her in reception.

"Hot" I mentioned

"Well you'll be up for our pool party after dinner then"

"Pool party?"

"David, our chef, he has a large pool and Monday nights since he came we always go for a swim, you're both invited and I won't take no for an answer"

"Well I'm in" Den agreed

"Er, okay" another curve ball.

"Great, wear your best bikini"

"Me too?" Den chortled

"Dennis! Just Nena in a bikini of course" talk about humour bypass!

"Okay then bigmouth, what do I do now? I've got three hours to come up with some sort of swimsuit that I don't want to wear to a party I don't want to go to!" I hissed at Den as we walked up to our rooms.

"You'll think of something!"

Maddy Bell 14.06.04

© 2004

Pictures of Nena have been generated using Ania's 'Cherie' Fkiss doll on Angy-Chan's template and are Copyright 2004. They are used with permission, if you'd like to see more go to www.acharsi.prv.pl

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