Mom woke me up when she got up at about seven thirty. We were still on the sofa, and Dad was sound asleep, having pulled the rug over us to keep us warm.

She smiled at me.

"That's what Dads are for," she whispered, and I smiled back and nodded.

She put the kettle on, and made some coffee.

I eased myself out from Dad's clutches and went to the bathroom. I showered and returned to my room and dressed. I wore a dress today, partially because I wanted to look nice for my parents, and partially because I wanted to be my dad's little girl. I know it was silly, but it helped having them here.

By the time I went back down, Dad was sitting at the kitchen table drinking a coffee.

"Morning squirt. Did you sleep okay in the end?"

"Yes thanks, Daddy," I said and gave him a hug.

"Do you get a newspaper?"

"Not usually. I never have time to read one. But I will go get you one if you like?"

"How far is the store?"

"A couple of minutes."

"Let me get dressed and I'll come with you," he said.

Twenty minutes later, I drove us to the store, and we went in. Dad picked up a newspaper, while I got a couple of cartons of milk and some other groceries that I figured we'd need.

Old Doug Williams, the storeowner and town mayor, came over to me and surprised the heck out of me by giving me a huge hug. He was known as 'No Credit Williams' because of his real mean attitude to giving credit to anyone, regardless of their circumstances. I noticed he still charged me for my groceries.

I introduced my Dad to him, and told him that he and Lou were brothers.

"We are all mighty proud of this little girl. She is one in a million," Doug told Dad.

Dad just smiled, and put his hand on my shoulder.

"One in a billion," he said, and shook Doug's proffered hand. As we left the store, a couple of passing cars hooted their horns and the drivers waved at me.

"You seem to have made your mark on this little community, my girl," Dad said with a smile.

"I just did my job, Dad."

"Yeah, right," he said, and we both laughed.

I drove home, and we had breakfast. The papers were full of it. They managed to find the photograph they'd taken when I was sworn in that first day, and I looked ever so young.

Lou phoned to ask me to be at the department by noon. We had a slow morning. I took my parents to the main street and did some shopping.

I felt very embarrassed, because everywhere I went I was treated like royalty. So many people, whom I hardly knew, hugged and kissed me.

We arrived at the department just before noon, and had to run the gauntlet of photographers. Thankfully, the TV people had gone home, so that was a relief.

I introduced my parents to those in the office, and the chief came out to meet us. He and Dad got on well, and then Lou appeared with a pleasant looking lady in a smart skirt and matching jacket.

"Sherri, this is Heather Simmonds. She is the counsellor I spoke to you about. Heather, this delightful girl is officer Sherri Brewster. Though to look at her now, you'd be hard pushed to connect her to the carnage that happened yesterday," he said with a grin.

I smiled and shook her hand.

"Don't listen to uncle Lou, he can be a real pain in the ass at times," I said, and her eyebrows shot up.

"I may look like a college girl, but I've been three years a cop," I explained.

We went across the road, to the coffee shop, and sat in a secluded booth.

Jenny brought us a coffee each, and squeezed my shoulder before leaving us alone.

"You seem to have an extended network of family and friends?" she said.

"Yeah, I'm really lucky. My folks flew in from Florida last night, and everyone in town is being real nice to me."

"Don't you think you deserve it?"

I shrugged.

"I just did my job. I was scared and had few options. One was to let them kill me, and I wasn't prepared to let them do that, so I just did what I could."

"Did you sleep last night?"

"Yeah, eventually. I got up at about two, and my Dad cuddled me to sleep on the settee."

"That's nice. Have you talked over what happened?"

"Yeah, with the Lieutenant from the sheriff's department. And my fiancé, and I know I can talk to dad if I feel the urge."

"Your fiancé? Where is he?"

"In law school back east."

"Was he worried about you?"

"Probably, but he isn't going to upset me by trying to get emotional. We don't work like that."

"Tell me about yesterday. How did you feel just afterwards?"

"Like shit. I puked and then shook like a leaf until I got back to the department. Gail got me a sandwich, and I felt better after that."

"You said you had difficulty getting to sleep. Why was that?"

"I guess all the day's events just wouldn't go away. So I got up to clear my head."

"How do you feel now?"

"Numb, a bit. Embarrassed, a lot, as I'm no one special, and everyone seems to think I am."

"Do you want to talk about the incident?"

"If you think it will help."

"Do you?"

"I don't see that I have a problem. Look, I shot and killed two men, I can't undo what's done, and even if I could go back with hindsight and do it differently, I probably would do it the same way. They were the men who chose their way of life, and as soon as they killed their first victim, their end was just a matter of selecting the officer, the time and place. As it happened, it was me, yesterday, and in my town. But had I not been there, or done something different, then some more poor innocents could be dead and not them."

"What did you feel as it was happening?"

"I didn't have time to feel anything, except scared and vulnerable. It was over in seconds, and I had very few options."

"You said if you could go back and do it again you do the same, even if that meant killing them?"

"You tell me how I could have done it without killing them?"

"I'm not qualified to do that, but how do you feel about death and killing?"

"Death? They say it's one of two certainties in life."

"Two?"

"Yup, the other is tax."

"Seriously, how do you feel about death?"

"Every day I put on my uniform, I know that it could be my last. I don't want to die, and I didn't want to die yesterday. I didn't kill them in cold blood, they were trying their damndest to kill me, so I simply defended myself. My honest answer is simple, I'm glad it was them and not me."

"What about their families?"

"What about the Sacramento officer's family?"

She smiled and shook her head.

"We are talking about your feelings here."

"Yeah. I'm a cop. I knew what I was getting myself into, and I was prepared to deal with the consequences of my decisions. I still am, I have to live with what happened, and you know, at the moment, I don't feel at all bad. I'd be happier if there had been another way, but there wasn't, and that is all there is to it."

"How do you feel about the publicity?"

"Vultures have to live too."

"You think the press are like vultures?"

"Sure. They feed of misfortune and scandal. How often do they report things like, 'Baptist Pastor brings six to know the Lord.' or 'Cop does a good job, again'?

"Instead we get, 'Minister caught in gay orgy.' or 'Corrupt cop cons hooker for free sex.' That isn't news, it is suffering and misery, and they peddle it like drug dealers."

"That is an amazingly cynical attitude in one so young," she said.

"Cynical? Get real, this is the real world, lady. Life is tough, hell, my first eleven years were sheer hell, and I have parents who love and care for me. I've wanted to be a cop for as long as I can remember, and apart from wanting to become a mother, there is nothing else I ever want out of life.

"But with the job comes responsibility, and I take my responsibility very seriously indeed. How often have you been in a house where poverty and abuse is a real daily issue? I'm not talking about the occasional slap when tempers fray, I'm talking about daily ritualistic abuse, sexual, physical and mental.

"How often have you been present when a parent holds their lifeless child in their arms after a drunk driver has just hit a school-bus line.

"I may have a different life perspective to you, but to label me cynical because our perceptions are different, now that is very sad," I said, and stood up to leave.

"Sherri, wait. I'm sorry," she said.

I sat down again.

"You feel angry, and I apologise."

I nodded.

"If you could change one thing about yesterday, what would it be?"

I thought about it for a moment.

"I'd have had more breakfast. Throwing up on an empty stomach really sucks," I said, and grinned.

She stared at me for a moment, and then smiled.

"Thanks for giving me your time. I appreciate it, and I am sorry if I offended you. I have been a counsellor for many years, but I have not had to deal with this type of incident with an officer before. I have found it fascinating, as you seem to belong to a completely different culture with a set of attitudes and values far in advance of everyone else. You are a very interesting girl, and you seem to have coped with your experience very well, so far.

"But as you may be aware, these types of incidents can trigger all kinds of mental side issues, and you must be prepared for that. I will leave you my card, and should you wish to talk to me about this or any other issue, then please give me a call," she said, handing me a card.

We walked back across the road, and into the department.

"Lou. I want to go back to work, tomorrow," I said, and he looked at Heather, who smiled and nodded.

Dad and Mom had gone to see Terri, and I drove over there for lunch again.

Lou took a few days off, and he and Dad went off into the bush for four days hunting.

Mom and Terri got on fine, and I went back to work. I was thrown into the deep end when a fight amongst some out-of-town youths started at the Elk on Friday night.

I was first on scene, and could hear the ruckus inside. I peered through the window, as Steve Miller pulled up in his cruiser.

"Hey Sherri, how do we play this?"

"You go in the front, and I'll go in the back."

He grinned.

"Okay, but don't shoot anyone," he joked.

"Aw, please, just one, a little one?" I said, and went round the back.

I heard Steve enter, and there was a subtle change in the noise.

I went in the back, and had my PR24 side-handled baton in my hand.

A large young man came through the door and faced me. He was the worse for wear for drink, and had blood coming from his nose. I could see his brain taking in my face, and then he frowned as he took in the uniform and the baton.

His drunken brain made him form a fist and he took a swing at me. I easily blocked the swing with a side block, and turned it into an arm-lock, and a pull-down. He landed hard, and made an 'OOOF' sound as he hit the wooden floor. I cuffed him and dragged him through the door into the bar.

Steve had three guys sitting on the floor with their hands on their heads.

"Okay Sherri?"

"Yeah, he's cool. Assault on an officer, attempt resist. Can I take him out and shoot this one, Steve?"

"No, you'd better not, remember the paperwork from the last two."

The locals all burst out laughing, and the three kids on the floor looked worried. We took them down to the station, and slammed them in the cage for the night. They were all unknown and too drunk to process right now.

We went back to the Elk and took some statements. It turns out that my big guy had taken exception to the way one of the other three had looked at him. They were all friends, but booze does weird things to people, and a fight had ensued.

Andy had tried to break them up, and was hit in the face by the same guy who tried to hit me. They'd called us at that point. When Steve had arrived, the big guy decided to fuck off and had met me out back.

Andy, nursing a swollen face, was happy to press charges. The other three were virtually innocent, but my guy was going to get charged with the lot.

I went back to the station again, and checked through his property. He was shouting, swearing and generally being a pain in the ass. I walked over to the cage and looked up at him. He was big.

"Listen you asshole. Lie down, shut the fuck up, and maybe we can get some peace and quiet," I said.

"Fucking make me. Bitch!"

There was a sudden silence as all the officers, civilians and prisoners were watching.

I took my utility belt off, and handed it to Steve.

"Keys," I said, and Steve threw me the keys.

I opened the cage, and he stood there bunching up his fists and swaying slightly.

I threw the keys back to Steve, and stepped up within a few feet of the man.

"Now, you ain't got bars to protect you. Repeat exactly what you said to me."

He looked at me, and then at everyone else.

"You got nothing on me."

"Nope, that's wrong. I recall you calling me a bitch," I said.

He wiped his mouth and nose with his sleeve, and nodded.

"Yeah, Bitc........."

He was down so fast he couldn't finish his sentence. I had his arm in a fulcrum lock, and even in his drunken state it must have hurt, a lot.

"Now. You and me are going to come to an understanding. You will call me Ma'am, and you will only speak when and if I give you permission."

"Fuc......."

I pulled his arm aback and his swearword ended with a scream.

"I don't remember saying you could speak. Did I?"

He said nothing.

"Did I?" I asked, pulling the arm.

"NO."

"No what?"

"NO MA'AM."

"That is better. Now, we have learned the first lesson. You will lie down, you will be quiet, and let your friends get some sleep, and us to have some peace. You are facing three charges so far, and if you persist in being a pain in the ass, I will think of a few more. So, soon your only worry will be who is gonna have your ass in the state pen. But then the pain will surely be in your ass."

He struggled a bit.

"Do you understand me?"

"Yes."

"Yes what?"

"Yes ma'am," he said, very much more subdued.

"Now, I am going to let you up. If you think you can take me, then go ahead, but remember, you are being watched, and the fact that I am a vulnerable female should never even enter your head."

I released him, and stepped out of the cage.

"Lie down, and behave," I said.

He clambered onto the bed, and folded his arms, glaring at me.

"That's better."

Twenty minutes later, he was snoring.

When sober, we charged him with assault, resist an officer, and public disorder. His friends were released with a caution. He was up in front of the judge in the morning, and someone let him in on who I was.

I gave my evidence, and he was a shadow of his former self. He pleaded not guilty because he claimed not to remember anything.

When I went through the altercation we'd had in the station, and I stated I had to restrain him because of his unruly and disruptive behaviour and he'd called me a bitch, there was an audible intake of breath from everyone in the court.

The Judge looked over at the man, and he was represented by the public defender. The defender was looking pale, and his client was looking even paler.

"I'll have you know, that Officer Brewster is something of a local heroine, and we don't take kindly to such language," said the judge.

The defender whispered to his client.

"Your Honor, my client wishes to change his plea to guilty."

"Too late, Grant. I find the case proved. Does your client wish to say anything?"

The man stood up.

"You Honor. I apologise to you, the town and the officer. I can't recall any of the events, and feel real bad about how I behaved."

"Humph," said the judge, and I had to stifle a giggle.

The Judge looked at me, and I raised an eyebrow.

"$500 dollar fine, and $500 compensation to the man you assaulted." he said.

The guy looked crestfallen, it had turned out to have been a real expensive night out.

"I had considered community service, but if this young man is allowed to remain in the town, and word gets out as to how he treated Officer Brewster, I can see the coroner being advised as to his demise."

I had to leave, as I could not keep my face straight any longer. The incident allowed me to get back into the swing of things.

Mom and Dad stayed for two weeks, and we had a great time. Dad came out with me for a couple of days on a ride along. We dealt with a couple of speeders and a domestic argument on the first day, and on the next day, we stopped an out of state van which turned out to have been stolen from Grant's Pass.

As we all sat round the table for the last dinner at Lou's place, my Dad put his arm around me,

"Sherri. There was a time when I wept for you. Life seemed to be stacked against you, and we were all so worried about you. Yet you have bounced back, and I am so proud of you, it almost hurts. Not only are you a wonderful daughter, you are a superb cop and a lovely human being. So thanks for making us so happy."

It was a wonderful evening, and Lou and Dad promised to spend at least a week each year in each other's homes. Lou had a while to go before retirement, and I could see dad was already looking at relocating up here.

His original plan had been to buy a ranch up here, but the warmth of Florida beaconed. Even so, I still think he liked the warmth too much, and besides, it gave them a chance to travel to very different locations and have a real change of scenery.

It was nice to see the cousins get to know their aunt and uncle, and it made me realise that my own brothers and sisters had spread to the four winds, and we had really lost touch.

Mom and I had our time alone, and she was more concerned about me than Dad these days. The incident had affected her more than anyone else, and I think she secretly hoped that I'd come to my senses and get a proper job or just hurry up and get married and have loads of kids.

I was sad to see them go, but Jimmy took them to catch their connection early the next day. I returned to the office and was surprised to find Lieutenant John Cowie in with the Chief.

"Hey Lou, what's he here for?" I asked.

He shrugged.

"I guess his investigation is over. They brought the shotgun back, in any case."

The Chief saw me and waved me in.

"Sherri, you know the Lieutenant?"

"Yeah. Hi Lieutenant. You here to bust me?"

They both smiled.

"Sherri, you remember our little chat a while ago?" the chief asked.

"You mean about whether I should stay here or spread my wings?"

"Yeah, well I have had a formal request for you to be attached to the detectives division of the Sheriff's department."

I was stunned.

The Lieutenant turned to me.

"Sherri, I have to tell you that my investigation is completed, and the DA has accepted my recommendations. As expected, you will probably get some state recognition for your actions, as well as whatever your chief decides. I find myself short on several investigating detectives, and I could do with a cop I can trust on the team, who is not afraid of getting her hands dirty.

"Do you want the job?" he asked.

"What does it entail?"

"Instead of just working here, you get to cover the whole county, and you will investigate all the felonies that come our way, either from towns like this, or the towns and villages that do not have any departments of their own."

"Where would I be based?"

"As a detective, you can take any of the towns in the county, and you could even work from here if you want. But you could pick up a job anywhere in the jurisdiction."

"I've never worked out of uniform."

"Well, you look good in uniform, so you should look better out of it," he said, and grinned.

"Will I need any training?"

"We run investigator's courses up at the academy, so if you can take four weeks out, then I'm sure you'd do well."

I frowned, I was planning to go to Maryland and see Peejay. It was October now, and so it would be November soon.

"Look, its Friday now. Come see me Monday in the office. I'll show you what will be required, and then you can think about it. The next investigators course is not until the middle of November, so if you want, we could look at an attachment to see if you like it?"

"Chief?" I said.

"I've already told you, I think you are wasting your talents in this place."

"Okay, Lieutenant, I'd like an attachment. If that could be possible."

"Good. You come in Monday morning, and I'll set you up. Now the chief tells me you were due some leave?"

"Yeah, I am going to Baltimore to visit my fiancé."

"When?"

"I was going next week."

"Can you leave it a week?"

"Yeah, I guess."

"Fine, come to us for a week. If you like it, I will book you in for the course, and you take off to see your fiancé. So, I'll see you Monday. I am looking forward to working with you."

He shook my hand, then the chief's and left.

"Okay?" the chief asked.

"I guess so," I said, and he chuckled.

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