It's a Mad World!
"So is it better then?"
"Is what better?" mad can be so vague sometimes.
"Well duh! Living here?"
"Oh right, S'okay I guess" I allowed.
"Your friends seem nice"
"They're okay but its not like with you guys." I've no idea where she's going with this.
"I should think not, you've know us for like ever."
"Yeah I know." I leant back against my bed.
The rest of the gang have taken Pia up on a vineyard visit but Mad said she wasn't feeling well so I volunteered to stay home with here. It's not like the Weinkönigin needs to look at more grape based stuff is it?
“There's no one else about so you can tell me the truth, I'm not blind you know.”
“Truth? What about?”
“Do I have to drag it out of you? The photo on the Bond wall of fame?”
Which photo? Then it dawned on me.
“Yes that. So come on, how'd you end up dressed like some Teutonic Valkyrie?”
“A whatty what?”
“Teutonic, oh never mind, come on spill.”
Hedging wasn't gonna get me out of this one!
“So lets get this right,” Mad grinned at me, “everyone here thinks you are a girl?”
“And you did nothing to like encourage this idea?”
“Why would I?”
“Who knows what goes on in that blonde bonce of yours!”
“Look I never once said I was a girl to anyone, its not like I was wearing dresses or something. I dunno why they latched onto the girl thing.”
“But like you never said anything?”
“Well I tried, but I guess it doesn't help that all my friends here are girls.”
“Your teachers must know you're a boy?”
“Yeah, I s'pose.”
“And they don't say anything?”
Mad shook her head, God he's useless!
“So why didn't you say anything at this wine thingy?”
“Well it was sort of cool, I mean like all these people voting for me, it's not like they know me or anything but they still voted for me. I never thought I'd win, like there's all these really pretty girls, why would they pick me? So what was the harm?”
“Have you looked in the mirror lately cuz?”
“Well it must be that your blind then, you um look how can I put this, er, really um cute.”
“So do you.”
“That's what I'm trying to say, you look like me. I'm supposed to be cute, I'm a girl, and you are supposed to look handsome.”
“You don't have to carry on!”
“So do the girls know?”
“Connie does for sure, I have told the others but its like they don't believe me.” I sighed.
“Well even in jeans and that I must admit I'd still think you were a girl.”
“I suppose these blobs on my chest don't exactly help do they?”
“True, they got bigger?”
“A bit,” I admitted, “the Doc said they might, she said something about surgery later on to remove them.”
I allowed myself a shiver at that thought. To be honest I've sort of grown ‘attached' to my little nubs and the thought of having them removed seems a bit – um weird?
“So you have to do it for a whole year?”
“Unless I emigrate.”
“No its not.”
“So why do it then?”
“I said before.”
“Well a year goes pretty fast, you get back to being you afterwards.”
“That is so not gonna happen is it? Everyone round here calls me Gaby whatever I dress in, my picture is on the town website , even my own family call me Gaby when I have to wear a dress!”
“You could chop your hair short and get loads of tattoos?”
“That's really helpful – not!”
“The only people who don't think I'm a girl are the cycle squad.”
“Have you got a picture, you mention them in your emails but I don't have faces for them?”
“Yeah there's one in my scrapbook, on the desk there”
Mad picked the collection of press cuttings; photos and other assorted guff up and started flicking through.
“Near the back I think.”
“This?” she showed me the page.
“I thought there were only four of you?”
Mad seemed to chew something over before speaking again. ‘If I didn't know I'd think it was four girls, they've even all got their hair in braids! I dunno Drew!
“So who's who then?”
I knew the picture well; Dad took it at the Möhne event back in the summer.
“That's Gret on my left then there's Roni and Tali.”
“Roni's the one who got trampled right?”
“Yeah, that was some event!”
“I miss going to races with you.”
Where did that come from?
“I thought you'd been riding the tens?”
“I did but it's not the same without you around.”
“If you say so.”
I'm not about to start arguing about it.
At least the weather stayed dry for the Barbie. The olds invited like loads of people so there were peeps from Apollinaris, the Pinger's which meant Kat, my mates of course and Jules invited some of her friends from school. Henryck Pinger, Kat's dad, got roped in to help Dad with the cooking; Dad hasn't quite got the knack of cooking schnitzel!
It was all going so well.
“Hey Gabs, you should show your friends your Königin dress.” Pia suggested.
“Yeah go on Drew, we saw the pictures at the restaurant.” Charlie encouraged.
Mum was no help.
“Maria and the girls haven't seen you in it yet either.”
“Please Drew?” Mad purred in my ear.
I'll never hear the end of it if I do or if I don't! I can't win can I?
Maddy Bell 26.03.08 © 2008
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